we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
third nipple confirmed
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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