you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Randomize
