She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
