My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
