Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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