We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
