I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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