he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
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