No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
