i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
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