a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
