Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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