I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
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There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
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Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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