She just used a chaser for red wine.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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