i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
