she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
