But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I could make wine with my vomit
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Randomize
