After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
