id be glad to
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Randomize
