I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
