evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
