so that wasnt chicken after all
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize