Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
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