So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
