In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
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