He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
True strength comes from lack of pants
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.