Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
