did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize
