remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize