Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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