I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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