apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Randomize