How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Randomize
