got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
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It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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