So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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