I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize