Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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