There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
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