Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
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