The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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