Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
