I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize
