Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
birth control should be required to get into college
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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