They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize