Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
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She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
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I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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