piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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