All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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