We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
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