So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
lets start a swedish sibling band together
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
