I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
